I have an eating disorder and this blog is where I rant about everything
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I’m losing control. I binged soooooooooo much last night when drunk.
I need to start restricting a lil bit again, so I don’t lose my damn mind and completely relapse.
I think I’m reaching my breaking point.
Apparently I weigh more than I thought, and I’m trying not to let it bother me, but it is bothering me. It’s bothering me a lot.
Plus I hate being seen as “sexy” and “thick” and having a “fatass”. I feel like im being more sexualized and seen as nothing more than a fuck since I started recovering.
Back when I was “bad” people liked me for my personality, not my looks, and people actually wanted to date me.
I’m like happyish with myself I guess now, but I don’t like how im being treated by others.
Recovery vs relapse.
I hate this battle, this constant battle.
I don’t know what ima let win, i know what is the “right” decision, but idk what I wanna do anymore.
2 days in a row of purging part of my dinner.
I’m SOOOOOOOO FUCKING GOOD at self-sabotaging
I should win an award!!
Pierce The Veil - I'm Low On Gas And You Need A Jacket - [video credit]
Gothec (via slutstatus)
this is very very very very important
so fucking very important(via wild-hippies-everywhere)